Conferences: Academic Word Vomit

Conferences are one of those things I vaguely remember hearing about in undergrad, though I mostly only remember them being the reason my professors cancelled classes. But I am only now learning more about "Why the f*ck would people want to sit around and listen to other people talk about random shit they decided to study or research?!" It's a subtle art, you see.

My experience goes like this: I presented at two undergrad conferences one in 2007 and again in 2009. These were the kinds of conferences everyone got into. I talked about fairy tales in one and surrogacy in another. Neither of which are topics I decided to pursue at length. Not a big deal, but it was still something to put on a resume (or as I now call it, a vitae. Fancy). Last weekend I had the opportunity to present at PCM, a conference for students at the college where I attend grad school. I assumed this conference was in a similar vein --though one guy was pissed he wasn't accepted and presented a poem during the doggerel about his experience in which the conference judges were equated with a cup that he then smashed. It was a mess. Did I mention there was free beer?

Anyway, this weekend I am traveling with two lovely ladies (Katlyn and Andi...actually, let me just change that to "ladies." Mmmkay.) to Savannah, GA to present at The 21st Annual British Commonwealth and Postcolonial Studies Conference. Now that sounds fancy. I am hoping this will feel like a different sort of conference. More relevance, but without any additional nervousness. I hope the only vomit that spews from my mouth is of the academic variety.

Our panel is on the living dead as seen in modern film. That's right, folks: zombies. I talk about The Walking Dead. There's also Children of Men and Firefly  among a plethora of other super-interesting topics of discussion. In short, our panel is going to rock! So I guess it doesn't matter if the conference seems more legit or not because we intend to have a blast!

As my professor said, "we are letting the zombies loose onto the world"...or something like that. He also said "May the force be with you" which was nice.

I hope to provide updates on our awesome adventures in the days to come!

My Zombie Text Date

I was gearing up for The Walking Dead tonight and had anticipated texting/watching the show remotely with a friend, Katlyn. This friend, however, succumbed to the peer pressure of her sister and boyfriend and watched The Grammy's instead! The horror!

After she texted asking me not to text her spoilers, I decided to text her to tell her what happened:

Me: They all just died. The show is over.

Katlyn: Fuck you.

Me: Shane and Rick are f*cking. Holy sh*t!

Katlyn: Hahahahaha

Me: Omg I can't believe the zombies are controlled by Voodoo aliens!!

Katlyn: Hahaha is the show filming in New Orleans now? It's moved to a Cajun setting!!

Me: Yes, it's crazy! Carl is the new group leader. They are hanging and watching zombies play football in the stadium.

Katlyn: Dude, this actually sounds like a good show!!

Me: The Candid Camera crew just came out and surprised the group--the whole thing was a set up!

Katlyn: Bahahaha damn! I thought it was all gonna be a dream!!

Me: Darabont isn't pulling a Bob Newhart. Now he's making the cast duke it out in a jello pit.

(Clearly bored with the Grammys now and wishing she were watching tv with me...)

Katlyn: Oh fuck. I guess that means Shane and Rick are f*cking again. I think it's gonna be a parallel universe/purgatory.

Me: Jack and Sawyer just joined in on the fight. They are all running from the black smoke monster.

Katlyn: This is perfect. Benjamin Linus is about to show up and reveal his master plan. He plays the governor.

Me: Juliet is talking with Lori about her bastard baby and the governor is making zombie Hurley fight zombie Nick Frost.

Katlyn: Zombie Hurley FTW!

Me: I'm blogging this.

Katlyn: You definitely should.


The moral of the story is if you stand me up for a remote tv watching date, I will harass the shit out of you and you will like it.